Ain't Life Grand

Tonight I sat in the hall waiting for the kids to get ready for scripture study.  We do scriptures while the 3 youngest are in bed and the 2 older girls are out in the hall with us helping to read.  I sat with my back resting up against the wall and realized how tired and exhausted I was.  I love that feeling sometimes and tonight it feels good.  I had a productive, fun day with my kids and I thoroughly enjoyed them.  I let them "help" me with all my chores so they all took longer, but I loved how proud they were of themselves.  I let Tanner and Kelsey help me rake up the yard and put the piles into the garbage, which means I had to lift her repeatedly so she could reach it (hence the reason my back is a little sore I guess).  We went to the park to enjoy this gorgeous weather and played sand monster.  They love that game, but they really only get into it if Nancy or I play it with them. Nathan rode his bike around and I am still blown away with how awesome he is at this 2 wheeler thing. I sat and thought of what a great blessing it is to be able to have my healthy body and that each member of my family is also healthy, well, and safe.  I am so grateful for that kind of exhaustion tonight.  I looked across the hall into the toy room with legos and cars scattered everywhere, and I smiled.  I don't usually smile at the sight of a messy room, but tonight I saw it a little differently.  It was messy because Tanner had played for an hour and a half all by himself this afternoon and gave me a little break.  I actually had a little snooze and he was an angel and played quietly without waking Kelsey or sneaking into the pantry. I am grateful for that.

I looked into the girls room and Daddy is laying by Kelsey and reading her a book.  He adores her.  And she adores him.  I love how they interact.  I see Eliza's Elsa cape hanging from her top bunk and I think of how much she loves to sing the Frozen songs and her excitement for the school talent show.  She has the whole thing memorized and she has had her outfit and routine all planned out for months.
Katelyn came and sat down next to me and she puts my arm around her as she snuggles into me.  I am filled with love for her as I think about how last year she was in so much pain and we didn't know why until tomorrow when we took her to the ER to find out her appendix had ruptured.  I am grateful for her strength and her recovery and again for all of our health and all that we enjoy because we have these wonderful, healthy, able bodies that we do.

I have really been loving life lately.  I really love MY life.  I am so very blessed and I know that.  We had a lesson in Relief Society recently and the teacher was talking about how many people question who they are and they take for granted what they have.  I am blessed to know who I am.  I have always had a pretty good grasp on that.  I have always known I was a daughter of God.  I also cherish being a Richards' daughter.  I love the family that I was raised in because they are the all time coolest, most amazing people I have ever met.  I am grateful for the family I married into.  They are so fantastic.  I love being related to a good friend from college.  Not everyone gets that. Hardly anyone gets that.  I love that blessing.  I love having 5 kids.  I love the ages and stages they are in.  I love the ease in which I can do the things I want to do.  The kids can do the workout videos with me rather than cry at my feet when I try to do them.  The kids can help me cook or keep me company instead of crying at my feet or needing to be held. I love the ease of biking to the park or taking the kids for a walk to Nancy's.  I love having my 2 little buddies with me while I shop.  There was a lady today that thought I was crazy for having 5 kids and I told her it is my favorite thing.  I told her I dread the day my kids grow up and I don't have this age and stage anymore.  I truly love and delight in this stage of my life.

Tomorrow we are having a party.  A "we are not in the hospital" or an "I'm so glad I don't feel like I am going to die" party.  Eliza thinks we should stuff ourselves with cake to celebrate it.  I don't think that is a bad idea. We may need caramel corn too though.

The Gift of Motherhood

I have been thinking a lot lately about what a gift it is to be a mother.  I don't know why I am blessed to be a mother and others don't get that opportunity.  Maybe because I need help in the patience department.  Whatever the reason, I am eternally grateful that I have 5 beautiful kids I get to call my own. Even on my worst day I still recognize that it is one of my greatest blessings.  (Church membership/my testimony, the Holy Ghost, my husband, my family, etc. also fall into that category.)  I would never trade my life now for anything.  I had such an incredible single life but now I love married life and motherhood more than anything. I couldn't sleep on Christmas Eve a few weeks ago because I was so excited for what the next day would bring.  I couldn't wait to see the kids faces.  I had worked excitedly for months finding and making the perfect gifts and I was just as excited (maybe more so) as I was for Christmas when I was a kid. I didn't take any thought for what gifts I would get.  I didn't even care.  The greatest gift I could get was seeing my kids light up when we switched on the living room light.  It was hours until I finally fell asleep. As I was lying there thinking about my kids I thought of how this is the greatest time of my life.  I was thinking of all the things I love about this stage of my life.  My kids are young, but not in that hard can't-get-out-the-house-or-sleep-for-more-than-ten-minutes baby phase.  My kids still want to be with us.  They will be silly with me.  They are learning to be useful.  I want to document more of these moments in my blog/journal to remember just how much I love this part of my life.  I want my kids to know how much I love being their mother and how fun it is.  I want them to know the little things that I love on a daily basis. So, here's to forgetting how far behind I am on the blog and just moving forward.

The other day I was sitting on my bed matching socks.  Since the kids had received new socks for Christmas I was throwing some old socks in the direction of the bathroom garbage, although none of them flew well enough to land inside.  The next thing I know Kelsey is chucking socks off the bed.  I was going to stop her and I gave a big sigh before I got up to pick up the socks and then I realized what she was doing.  She was copying me.  She had no idea why I was throwing socks but she was following suit.  I started laughing and then she gave her little scrunched up smile and threw the socks at a much faster pace.  She can get away with anything with that scrunched up smile of hers.

Last night Kelsey had a fever before bed. I gave her some medicine and I rocked her until she fell asleep. That is by far one of my favorites as a mom by the way. She woke up in the middle of the night and was burning up again.  I got her up and got her a cold drink and then some medicine.  I took her back to my room and sat on my bed rocking her in my arms for a minute and then I laid down.  Kelsey fell asleep right next to me. She has never done that.  She will only fall asleep in my arms when I rock her.  (And that has only been the last couple of months since I am such a softie.  I can't let go of the baby phase with her.)

I was shopping one day with just Kelsey.  Tanner was at preschool at Nancy's.  As I walked up and down the aisles I was talking to her, telling her remind me to get this or that.  I talked to her like she could respond.  Like we were buddies.  I mean, we are buddies, it's just the conversations are sorta one sided right now.  People looked at me like I was weird and I realized that I am going to miss having her as a shopping buddy.  I enjoy shopping by myself, but I can do that at night or on Saturdays when daddy is home. When all of the kids are in school I am not going to have the option to have a buddy to go run my errands and chat with me.  I will miss that.  I will miss her cute little smiles and funny faces in line.  I will miss her saying "hi" to everyone and waving. I will miss everyone telling me my daughter is beautiful. (Not that she needs to hear it anymore than she already does.) I will miss having the kids with me to excuse the extra candy I buy. I will miss my buddies.

Conversations to Remember

On Saturday we had asked the kids to do their chores.  They were complaining about it as usual.  Nathaniel called Eliza, Katelyn, and Nathan into the kitchen to talk to them.  He had all 3 of them on one side of the dishwasher and he was on the other.  He was sick of their griping and wanted to prove a point.
Nathaniel: "Who made breakfast?"
Kids: "Mom did"
Nathaniel: "Who cleaned up breakfast?"
Kids: "Mom did"
Nathaniel: "Who is sweeping right now?"
Kids: "Mom is"
Nathaniel: "Who wiped the counters?"
Kids: "Mom"
Nathaniel: "So who HASN'T done anything around here?"
5 year-old Nathan: "ummm....you?"
I could not stop laughing.  I don't think his point got across.


Today as I picked up the kids from Nancy's after my dentist appointment I had a hard time getting Tanner to stop playing and come to the door.  I was standing in the doorway and Kelsey was sitting on the pumpkins on the front porch area.  Tanner and Isaac came to the door together and as I am talking to Nancy Tanner turns to Isaac and says, "Isaac, put up your hands."  Then he says, "Mom, we have this many more minutes til we have to go."  Meaning his ten and what he had hoped would be Isaac's ten, but he hadn't listened.  It was a good effort and really humorous.

Kate's 7th Birthday!

Kate, today you turned 7.  Although I can't believe you are 7 already on one hand, on the other I can't believe you are only 7.  It seems like you have been with me for far longer than that.  You are my sweet girl.  You were from the start.  I remember I called you my angel baby.  You were not demanding or high maintenance.  You would patiently wait to be fed, held, rocked, or put to bed.  That was very nice of you since Eliza was just 13 months and 9 days old when you were born.  She didn't even take her first steps until we brought you home from the hospital.  It would have been really hard on me if you were a stinker...but you weren't.  I remember working in the office of the storage facility and you would sit in the swing while I worked, or you would hang out with me in the carseat while I swept units.  You were just a good baby.
You have always been funny.  Not that you try to be funny, you just are naturally.  I always smile when I am around you (...okay, not ALWAYS.  You and Nathan love to push each others buttons lately and it doesn't make me smile).  You also play along with me when I tease you or do crazy things.  I love to get a good laugh out of you.  I'm glad you have a good sense of humor.
You are my peacemaker (for the most part).  My reality check.  My calming sense.  When I start to get frustrated with one of the kids you try to work extra hard or compliment me or go out of your way to give me a hug so I am happy again.  When a certain nameless sister complains about what we are having for dinner (AGAIN) and I start to sigh because I am so sick of the whining and complaining, you will say how yummy it is and thanks for making it.  I know sometimes you don't even really like it, but you will eat it and sometimes even ask for more to make me feel better and make me smile.  You are very sensitive like that.  I hope you always are.  I love that about you.
I love that you try new things.  The other kids always ask you to open things because they know that no matter what it is, Kate can open it or will keep trying until she figures it out.  Popsicles, water bottles, toys, etc.  You are the go to girl.  You aren't scared to try something new.  That is a great thing in life.  There are a lot of things I wish I would have tried to do earlier in life, but I didn't.  Maybe I was scared.  Maybe I didn't want to fail.  But you, you try anyway.  You'll go far kid.
You have the spunkiest taste in clothes.  You will pick out things that I would never put together and somehow you pull it off.  I am amazed with things you pull out of your drawers and wear.  You obviously didn't get that from me.  I have no fashion sense what-so-ever.  It is so fun to see that side of you.  And you love to do your own hair.  Sometimes I want to take it out and smooth it out a bit, but I rarely do.  I love how you figured it out on your own.
You are a good friend.  You are a good dancer.  You are good at writing and drawing.  You are very creative when you play.  You go to bed well (when you don't have your sister with you that is).  You are a good sister, especially to Kelsey.  You are always helping to buckle her up for me.  I love a good helper.
You have been so good about trying this gluten free thing out for a while.  You haven't complained about missing out on things or wanting to eat you favorite mac-n-cheese.  I really appreciate it.  What a trooper you have been.  I'm not even convinced that removing gluten is the solution to your tummy aches, but thanks for going along with it just to be sure.  Thanks for trusting me.
Today we spent some time together, just you and me.  We went and bought your present, went to lunch, and watched the new Monsters University movie.  I had so much fun with you.  During the movie you snuggled up to me and said you loved me and you were glad we got to go together.  I was in heaven.  I love those moments with you.  Moments like yesterday as we read Winn-Dixie together in my bed and you moved in closer and snuggled up to me and said "Mom I love to snuggle with you.  I love you."  Being your mom is absolutely one of my favorite things ever.  Thanks for letting me be YOUR mom.  I hope we are always close and good friends.

Kate's Surgery

Tuesday afternoon (the 5th) the school nurse, Olivia, called me.  Kate has a tummy ache.  My sister-in-law, Becca, happened to be at my place so I jumped in the car and got Kate.  We think that perhaps Kate may have been faking sick since she is running around and playing just fine at home.  Tuesday night, Kate pukes.  No surprise.  Tanner and Kelsey had the pukers (and diarrhea) just a couple of days earlier.  Wednesday and Thursday Kate doesn't want to eat, or watch TV, or move.  Wednesday I could at least get her to drink a little.  By Wednesday night she can't keep anything down.  Middle of the night Wednesday she keeps waking up yelling, "owie, owie, owie!" and we end up on the living room floor to help everyone else in the house sleep.  Thursday she won't eat or drink anything.  She can't walk without lots of pain.  It hurts when she pees.  She has a fever.  I take her to urgent care Thursday at 6 p.m. I figure it has to be something bigger than just the flu.  (Back in December she was really sick with the flu and had fevers, slept a lot, wouldn't eat/drink much, and didn't want to get off my bed.  So before you think I am the world's worst mother...it isn't too unlike her when she is sick to act this way!  The pain while she moved it what finally did it in.  I figured that is not normal for the flu.)  Urgent care said it was bigger than what they were comfortable with and sent me to the hospital to get blood work done.  I called Nathaniel on the way to the hospital to let him know what was going on and started to cry.  I had to turn the radio up so Kate wouldn't hear me and know that I was a little scared at what might be to come.  I carried my little girl wrapped in a blanket with no shoes on into the hospital and we check in at 7:11 p.m.

 Kate at the ER on Thursday, March 7th around 7:30 p.m.  She is smiling, but you can see she is miserable!

 She is beautiful even when she is horribly sick and exhausted.  

By 2:30 we were told it was her appendix and we would need surgery in the morning.

 Getting prepped for surgery (around noon on Friday)

 Being wheeled into surgery by Nana (Kate is already sleeping even though they haven't put her under yet.  She would wake up every few minutes asking if it was over yet.)

 After surgery in recovery.  That cup is there because she hated the oxygen mask.  The nurse put the oxygen hose into the bottom of the cup and put it near her nose so she didn't have to wear the mask.  Her little blue bear, Ty, went with her everywhere.  The peds unit gave her that bear.

Her appendix had a tear in it and had been leaking causing an abscess.  The infection was pretty bad and we were told it would be a week in the hospital from the day of surgery.  I thought we would be out sooner...WRONG!

Back up in her room.  Trying to cool her down from a fever.  

She had fevers until Tuesday night at 11p.m. 

 Her first time eating in a week!  She got to start eating food on Tuesday and she was excited!

She loved being able to order from the hospital and felt like royalty...until about 24 hours later...then Dad brought in the chicken nuggets.  Even kids don't like hospital food.

 Starting to see that smile again.  I missed my happy little Kate!

Below: I hated seeing my baby (she'll always be my baby) hooked up to that IV all week.

It made her seem so fragile.

 Kate's primary teacher, Yasmin Fox, had the kids make this for Kate.

It had little candy bars taped to each stick.

They may not have lasted long enough to get this picture.

 I found Kate doing this one evening as Nathaniel and I switched places.  It took me so off guard.  She had been in so much pain that it was such a relief to see her smiling and moving normally again....and then the morphine wore off and she was in pain again.  That is too much pain for a 6 year old to have to endure.  I so badly wanted to switch her places.  I hate feeling so helpless.

 We were so happy to get these bracelets OFF!  Kate had to have 3 different bracelets made for her (each a different size) since she kept taking them off.  She hated them.

 Friday (8 days later): All dressed and waiting to go home. 

 Nana gave her these socks at Christmas time.  They are from the hospital but they weren't going to use them so Nana took them and gave them to the kids.  Kate LOVED them and wore them all the time around the halls.  She even wore them home and to the Easter egg hunt the next day.

 So happy to see her baby sister again!  The kids were not allowed to visit Kate at the hospital since it is still flu season.  They were all so happy to see her.  We stopped by the school and saw Eliza on the way home and it was the sweetest thing to see that interaction.  Eliza got this big smile on her face and they hugged each other and Eliza kept hugging her and hunching over to look at her and if Kate coughed Eliza would get worried and say, "Kate...are you alright?!"  I almost cried at how sweet they were together.

So happy to have everyone back together under one roof.  I am so grateful to my Yuma family that helped me out in a million ways.  I would have been a basket case without all of the help.  Nana, Papa, Nancy, and Becca, you guys are incredible!  This experience would have been so much more stressful and scary without your help and support.  Thank you!

I am also grateful for all of the time I was able to spend with my little girl.  That is not an experience I want to have again, but I loved some of those memories and laughs we had.  I feel much closer to her than before.  That is one thing I will always be glad for.

Pollyanna

I just love Pollyanna.  She is my role model.  I want to be more positive like her.  My grandma is a Pollyanna.  I have had a stressful few days.  So, instead of focusing on the rotten stuff I was thinking that it would help me to remember the things that are making me happy.  

*When Juner threw up this morning, he made it to the toilet.  I love it when I don't have to scrub puke off the carpet.

*Because of the puking I knew we would not be heading out on the town today, I decided to let myself wear my lounge pants all day.  I never do that.  I'm a "let's get up and moving and get on with our day" kinda gal.  I don't hang out in my pjs all day.  I didn't even work out.  Serious slacking going on here and I am pretty okay with it.

 *Kelsey's bedhead this morning was AWESOME!  She had a high fever last night and she let me rock her for a couple of hours until she finally felt well enough to sleep.  Since she had been so sweaty, she had a major "bonus" in the morning.

 *Kelsey loves to watch the kids play outside.  When I came into the kitchen I found the kids playing with Kelsey through the window in the door.  Soooo cute!  She loved it.

 *Kelsey's little buns in those tight pants are too adorable!  I want to pinch her little cheeks all. day. long.  But I have other things that occupy my time besides bum pinching unfortunately.

 *Those happy blue eyes and her smile are so contagious.  I love them.  And that rainbow shirt is so stinkin' cute on her!

 *I love finding things that make Kelsey happy.  She can be slightly high maintenance at times.  Peek-a-boo is a favorite.  She has also discovered the piano and loves to pound on it.  Since I got it for a whopping $75, I am fine with her pounding on it.  I just don't have the time to let her sit on my lap all day to play on it.  So, I strap her in her booster and she can go to town.  Love it!

 *Daddy convinced me to increase our internet speed.  I do have to say it is nice to upload pictures and not have it take half an hour.  Kelsey was such a big helper with installing the new modem.

 *Have I ever mentioned how much I love Yuma winters?  The weather is great.  Farming is in the air.  This guy was in front of me going down a main road.  We passed several other tractors on the way home.  Seeing tractors (and the smell of them) remind me of my 5 summers on my aunt and uncle's tart cherry farm.  I have happy memories of those times.  I love to see different types of fruits and vegetables grown and harvested since then.  I LOVE seeing the lettuce fields.  I am glad that there are random fields all over town.  It makes me feel like we live in a small town and they remind me of the first time I came to Yuma to meet my husband's family.  I couldn't get over how cool the lettuce fields were (you don't see that in Washington where I grew up).  He thought I was crazy (he was right, but he married me anyway!).

 *I love that I get to stay home with these crazy boys.  Tanner climbed in bed with me yesterday morning and snuggled for a good 20 minutes.  Yay for sleeping in past 6 a.m.! Nathan is very into "Mom, take a picture of me doing this..."

 *I love how much Eliza loves to read.  She gets so excited when The Friend comes in the mail.  She made herself a "reading corner" and read the whole thing the day it came.

*I love my spunky little Kate.  She made me some colorful paper flowers that last far longer than real ones and were free.  Boy does she know how to get to my heart!

*I love that I have a supportive husband that is ever so patient and forgiving.  I sure married a good one.  I love that when I went visiting teaching last night the kids were in bed when I got home.

*I am happy that I am in good health.  It is hard to take care of others when you are not feeling well yourself.  (So in other words, it could be worse...it could be me that is sick.)

*I just smelled the double bubble Kate came home chewing and it reminded me of being a kid.  I had THE BEST childhood.  Nope, it's not up for debate.  I really did have the best time as a kid.  Hands down!  I didn't worry about bills, or fevers, or the size of my waistline then.  Which leads me into the next one...

*Last, but not least, I am grateful for the GF treats Nancy dropped off at my doorstep.  I already made (and ate) the brownies.  (Curse Bless you for knowing I can't resist GF treats!  At lease I can run it off tonight with Tyrel.) They are very tasty!  She takes such good care of me.

Say a Little Prayer

Obviously, being active members of the church, we pray regularly in our home.  Unfortunately, it is rarely a very reverent thing.  The kids are wiggly, they poke each other, talk, tattle...you get the picture.  I feel like I have failed as a mother seeing as they don't value prayer like I think they should.  It really makes me so sad every time we kneel down to pray and the kids can't get through it without being naughty.  But, there still may be hope for my little ones. 
On Sunday I joined my family in a fast for my cousin.  She was having some serious complications in a long awaited pregnancy.  I was explaining to my kids why I was fasting when it wasn't a fast Sunday.  My 6 year old, Katelyn, came up to me and said, "Mom, I'm going to fast lunch for your cousin."  She walked away and I thought how sweet that was of her to do.  She came back into the kitchen a few minutes later and said, "I just went into the living room and said a prayer for your cousin that her baby would be okay."  I got a little teary-eyed and hugged her.
Yesterday, Nathaniel's scooter was having some problems so I dropped him off at work with his bike so he could ride home after work.  When Nathaniel opened the side door to get his backpack out he saw Nathan in the back seat with his eyes shut and mumbling.  Nathaniel laughed and asked what he was doing.  Nathan said, "I was saying a prayer for you that you will ride your bike safely home to us."  Sweetest thing that he has ever done. 

So maybe we haven't failed after all.